bakura and maliks guide to evilness
by queen-ofegypt
Summary: bakura and malik have STUDENTS and they teach the students about beng evil VERY evil from food poisoning to killing gasp REad and REview bakuraOC malikOC
1. Default Chapter

Thanks to sabby64 for the idea and don't ask why you just gave me the idea ok? No arguing ok? Now on to the first lesson  
  
Lesson 1 introduction (bahahahaha)  
  
Bakura- you foolish mortal I should send you to the shadow realm for just appearing in this page  
  
Lily- Bakura .....  
  
Bakura- ah yes me and my friend points beside him and sees no one grr now where did that bastard go?  
  
Malik- flirting with his FAN CLUB (malik has one of those too) how about we hook up some time flashing a seductive look  
  
Random girl- squeal oh that would be wonderfull  
  
Bakura- sees malik 'flirting again are we now...... hey how come I never get any girls maybe I am too scary to have a girlfriend hmm that's right hahaha I will rule the world ..... as soon as that bastard dies'(sorry yami fans) taps malik's shoulder  
  
Malik- turns around ah buddy pal.... pats bakura's back  
  
Bakura- save the small talk mortal we have students to teach!  
  
Malik-flashing a charming smile if you will excuse us my dear....  
  
Random girl- faints  
  
Malik- you think we should help her?  
  
Bakura- no best leave her there she's a whore anyway  
  
Lily- were did our teacher go (Lily is a nicy-nice girl so she doesn't know much about tombrobbering and whatnot But that will all change very soon! Bahahaha)  
  
Ashley- I dunno maybe a man with a weird accent came up to them and said eat poopy (the only way to describe Ashley is "sense of humor (major sense of humor) but that sense of humor will become a sick and twisted sence of humor very soon! Bahahaha)  
  
Lily- do you think that is possible? I mean about only 2% of the majority of people actually have the nerve to go walk up to a complete stranger and say "eat poopy"  
  
Ashley- true but it would be funny if anyone actually had the nerve  
  
Random person- pops up in front of Ashley EAT POOPY runs away screaming  
  
Lily- -- that was uncalled for  
  
Bakura- dragging malik do I have to pull you like a dog to keep you away from every girl that walks by? Lily and Ashley are waiting for us you mortal!  
  
Malik- you mean they are girls  
  
Bakura- are you that naïve? yes they are girls and you better not pull any moves on either of them or you will have to deal with me  
  
Malik- ok already let me go and I'll behave  
  
Bakura- lets go of malik you better be true to your world mortal  
  
Lily- looking around for Bakura  
  
Bakura- see's Lily and walks towards her I finally got that idiot off the girls  
  
Ashley- y' know I had a dream about that once one guy chasing after a million girls it was soooo funny.  
  
Lily- really?  
  
Ashley-really  
  
Bakura(sarcastic tone) well dejavu  
  
Malik- ok I get first picks!!!!!!  
  
Bakura- why do you get first picks you wanabee  
  
Malik- cause I am blonde  
  
Bakura- fine but hurry up you are wasting my afterlife  
  
Malik- I pick Ashley  
  
Bakura- good cause I was going to pick Lily  
  
Lily- tugging at bakura's sleeve so master bakura, when do we begin  
  
Bakura- Right now I'm going to take you on a date  
  
Lily- date?  
  
Bakura- to help you on your additude Frankly I don't like it you should be more aggressive  
  
Lily- yes I will try master smiles sweetly  
  
Bakura- 'atleast she is obiedient'  
  
Malik- hello beautiful  
  
Ashley- hahahahahahahaahaha now that's funny ahahahahaahahahahah you're kidding right ?  
  
Malik- nope you are actually the first girl I've ever considered pretty  
  
Ashley- really  
  
Malik- yup!  
  
Ashley- wow  
  
Malik- now lets go to a place where we can eat it's on me  
  
Ashley- ok sure then  
  
if you have any idea's you would like to share with me please review and let me know ok?  
  
& that wuz the first chappy peoplez 


	2. ice CWEAM GASP

Yo peoplez hope you guys and gals like this story so far.......first of all I would like to say I DON'T OWN YUGIOH (although I wish I did) that's all for now on to the next chapter  
  
Reminders action mind talk 'thoughts' Authoress' notes of insanity  
  
Bakura took Lily's hand and led her to a nearby ice-cream store.  
  
Owner- what flavor would you two like  
  
Bakura-bloody murder!!!!!! And you?  
  
Lily- just vanilla thank you  
  
The owner slowly began to scoop up the icecream into the cups  
  
Bakura- what are you? A turtle? Scoop faster you fool  
  
Lily- Bakura, you shouldn't yell at the poor man  
  
Bakura- first of all here is lesson #1 if you want work to be done efficiently you have to make others fear you  
  
Lily- and how may I ask you do that?  
  
Bakura- by yelling at them of course  
  
Lily- sorry I dint notice before.  
  
Bakura- Its quite alright love, everyone makes mistakes  
  
Lily- not you  
  
Bakura- I have made mistakes in my past days......  
  
Owner- here you are hands them their icecreams oh and that will be 12$  
  
Bakura checked for camera which there were none and noone was in the store either...  
  
Bakrua- handing Lily a knife Lily, this is your first test throw the dagger at the man  
  
Lily- what if someone is watching ?  
  
Bakura- no one is watching now THROW THE BLOODY DAGGER  
  
Lily threw the dagger as hard as she could, the knife went straight through his face and somehow stopped in between Blood was everywhere it spilled all over the counters, slowly dripping to the ground  
  
Bakura took the dagger from the mans face and left him to die. Lily cried a tear bakura saw that even though his back was facing her but as soon as her turned around Lily wiped that tear away quickly, took her vanilla icecream and followed bakura out of the store.  
  
Bakura- 'perhaps I should take her some place nice' Lily , do you want to go to the park or some place relaxing?  
  
Lily nodded. So bakura took her hand and led her to a pretty park with sakura trees everywhere this peak ws so beautiful who knew bakura had this sence of peacefulness  
  
They sat under the biggest sakura tree Lily had ever seen she sat down beside bakura and they silently started eating their icecreams until bakura broke the silence  
  
Bakura- you know that vanilla is a disusting flavor for icecream  
  
Lily- its good  
  
Bakura- then try my icecream and see what I mean  
  
Bakura gave her his icream which looked like a melting blob of blood. Lily carefully took her spoon and took a bit of bakura's ice cream and put it to her mouth  
  
Lily- it tastes like.........  
  
Lily tried to configure the taste until she finally got the answer  
  
Lily- Blood!  
  
Bakura was now smileing  
  
Bakura- do you like it  
  
Lily- it's a unique flavor I'd have to say so myself, why don't you try mine?  
  
Bakura- ok....  
  
Lily handed bakura her cup of icecream bakura took a bit of hers and put it to his mouth  
  
Bakura- this is way too sweet for me  
  
Lily frowned  
  
Bakura- but it is delicious anyways smile ever seen bakura smile? I haven't either  
  
Bakura- I guess its true on what they say....  
  
Lily-what exactly do they say?  
  
Bakura- people say that their personality lies in their favorite ice-cream flavor. Vanilla is soft and sweet like you, and bloody murder is a ruthless flavor like me.  
  
Lily- oh don't say that, you are not ruthless, you might be mean to everyone else but you are nice to me, aw come on you are not that cold hearted.  
  
Bakura- true but you are not that innocent either, and by the way you got a 98% on your first test .  
  
Lily- really? Oh I'm so happy  
  
Bakura smiled down fondly at her  
  
Bakura- you will be one of the best thieves by the time Im done with you  
  
Lily- I feel truly blessed upon having you as my teacher  
  
Bakrua- and I you  
  
Lily- may I hug you  
  
Bakura- no...... just kidding  
  
Lily hugged bakura and for the first time of her life she felt safe you see the reason she wanted to learn how to be a tomb robber is because she dint want anymore guys hitting on her but more on that later  
  
Bakura- why don't we go spy on Malik and Ashley?  
  
Lily- I hope he doesn't hit on her  
  
Bakura- that's why we are going to spy on them  
  
Lily- ok why don't we black-mail them too if they do anything embarrassing?  
  
Bakura- you're learning quickly and I already have a digital camera with me so don't worry  
  
Lily- good ! this will be fun  
  
Bakura- for once I agree!  
  
so that wuz the second chapter.... Again if you have any idea's don't hesitate to review and tell me about them and I may consider it flames are also accepted I take constructive criticism very seriously so if you write flames please have them to make sense. thankz 


	3. chapppy 3

RANDOM RANT- "one who desires to control the gods are actually being controlled by the gods"- yugioh, false bound kingdom END OF RANDOM RANT On to the chappy  
  
Three Random girls were trailing Malik at this time and you guessed it malik wanted to go up to them and ask if they wanted to go 4 some coffee but he had to make a good impression to Ashley  
  
Malik- intertwine your hand with mine  
  
Ashley- meaning what?  
  
Malik- hold my hand dammit  
  
Ashley- ......ok.......  
  
Ashley took Malik's hand and as soon as she did Ashley saw those fangirls frown and walk away.  
  
Ashley- ' that must be why he told me to hold his hand, poor guy those girls must've been chasing him from birth'  
  
Ashley looked at Malik for a brief moment, memorizing his facial features the way his hair always swayed in the wind, the way his eyes were colored with pale lavender that is only found on blossoms.  
  
Ashley-'I don't blame them he is cute .... In a way....' blushing  
  
Malik- is there something wrong?  
  
Ashley- why  
  
Malik- Its just that you are going red, is holding my hand too much  
  
Malik's eyes glistened with mischief and slyness  
  
Ashley- no it's not that.....  
  
Malik decided not to argue any further he knew this girl was digging him what more can he want?  
  
Lily- how are we going to track them down?  
  
Bakura- I also have that worked out  
  
Lily- huh?  
  
A shimmering light appeared on bakura's chest then out of nowhere this circular necklace appeared on his chest and it had little pointers on the edge of the circular gold Lily suspected it could be from Egypt when she saw a eye which looked like the eye of Horus but different in a way.  
  
Lily- ' he knows magic too? What can this guy not do?'  
  
Bakura- ring guide me to that imbecile Malik he can't be that far off  
  
The little pointer rose up and pointed left and bakura started running in all different directions with Lily following close behind until he stopped at a fancy looking restaurant  
  
Bakura- typical Malik  
  
Lily- this place looks a little formal don't you think we should change first  
  
Bakura- good idea  
  
Bakura's necklace started rising and there was a blinding flash of light Lily closed her eyes and when the light faded she opened her eyes she saw bakura in a white tux and well he looked good.  
  
Lily- b bakura you look.......dashing  
  
Bakura smirked and said "you look quite beautiful yourself take a look" . Bakura led her to the mirror of the restaurant Lily observed herself . She had a white strapless dress matching Bakura's tuxedo that brought out her lightly tanned skin, on her eyes were eyeliner which was perfectly put on with lip-gloss and white gloves that went to her elbows to finish it off  
  
Lily- you got good taste  
  
Bakura-ok we are all dressed now for the restaurant  
  
Bakura and Lily walked into the restaurant bakura spotted malik sitting in a booth with Ashley bakura led Lily to a table 4 two near the booth Ashley and malik was sitting.  
  
that wuz the third chappy peoplez read & review!!!!! 


	4. chappy 4

Sorry I haven't updated in a while but here is the next chapter  
  
Let the blackmailing begin  
  
Lily- wont your hair give it away?  
  
Bakura- its all the matter of camouflage  
  
Lily- ah... camouflage ......  
  
Bakura- (smiles wickedly) is something wrong?  
  
Lily- .....no......  
  
Bakura- good cause I don't appreciate people making fun of my hair Tombrobbers have feelings too you know  
  
Bakura's back was facing malik but he had the power of telepathy so he could hear what they were saying and lily saw what they were doing  
  
So far he has'nt hit on her yet.......  
  
Just then a green haired boy about 16 years of age walked in he had one eye that was golden and one that was green  
  
He imidiatly recognized Bakura and pulled up a chair  
  
"Dartz......"  
  
"hello Bakura"  
  
"who's he Bakura?"  
  
"oh meet Dartz"  
  
Dartz- pleasure (kisses her hand)  
  
Lily- thank you .... ( blushes)  
  
Bakura- dint know you hit on girls too  
  
Dartz- its  
custom to pay  
special  
attention to  
girls specialy  
the really  
pretty ones  
(Looks at Lily  
  
Bakura- hmph youre not the only one who pays special attention to girls (looks at malik)  
  
Dartz- ah malik is here!!!! Oh good hey Mal( is cut off by Lily hugging him)  
  
Lily- (whispering in his ear) we're are spying on them  
  
Dartz- (also whispering in her ear) but why  
  
Lily- to make sure he doesn't seduce my friend here  
  
Dartz- oh that girl there......  
  
Bakura- so you're stuck with us whether you like it or not we cant let you escape and give us away (smirking)  
  
Dartz- I actually don't mind it here ........ I quite enjoy it here  
  
Bakura- (realized what he meant and starts fuming)   
  
Lily- calm down Bakura, at least Dartz is looking on the bright side  
  
Bakura- looking to the bright side MY ASS  
  
Lily- (cringing) bakura your hurting an innocent girl's virgin ears ;;  
  
Dartz- such foul language  
  
Bakura- wana hear more?  
  
Dartz/Lily- uh ...   
  
I think Malik is a BLEEPING BLEEB he is such a BLEEP, hitting on every girl that walks by , If I had a dollar for every time he BLEEPING hit on a girl I would be BLEEPING rich, that BLEEP(GASP) he probably BLEEPED HIS OWN MOM  
  
--   
  
Dartz- dint his mom die giving birth to him....  
  
Bakura raises his finger about to say some thing .......  
  
Bakura- oh ya .... She did dint she...... opps my mistake  
  
--   
  
Malik- (looking at the menu)  
  
Ashley-the spaghetti sounds good ..... remembers that lady and the tramp movie ....... I better not  
  
Malik-im done  
  
Ashley-what did you pick  
  
Malik- oh just the mantu  
  
Ashley- whats that  
  
Malik- its Persian its really good  
  
Ashley- I guess I'll take that too  
  
Malik - you like my taste now?  
  
Ashley- () no..... I just want to try something new  
  
Malik- fine ...... what ever you say (smirks)  
  
Lily- that little bastard  
  
Dartz- (gasp) LILY!  
  
Lily- sorry (smiles sheepishly) it just makes me so angry malik's already making moves on her !!!!!  
  
Bakura- im surprised that he has'nt seduced her yet.....  
  
Lily- s-seduce?  
  
Bakura- ya by now he could've seduced her  
  
Dartz- who knew Malik of all people could stoop so low  
  
Lily- ;; my poor friend is going to get seduced......  
  
Dartz- Bakura don't scare her  
  
Bakura- I'm only telling the truth  
  
Dartz- do it in a more kindly manner ( turns to Lily and hugs her) there there its okay  
  
Lily- he's so so so WARM!!!! (blushing like a cherry pop)  
  
Bakura- how do you do it in a more kindly manner huh? You little Atlatean Atlantis guy  
  
Dartz- watch and learn  
  
Dartz began running his hands through Lily's hair as if it were silk  
  
"Lily............" his voice was so soothing right now so gentle "your friend is going to get seduced if we don't protect her"  
  
"really"  
  
"............. Yes.........."  
  
"then will you help me protect her?"  
  
"Anything for you Lily" he kissed the top of her forehead Lily practically melted into Dartz's arms  
  
Bakura let out a soft growl  
  
Lily's voice then sounded worried "but- but what if we don't get to her on time ? what if he does seduce her?"  
  
Bakura smirked ' hes not going to pull this one off'  
  
Dartz kept running his hand through her hair he sighed ".....................then I'm afraid I'd have to kill him" he said ever so softly so softly nevertheless Lily heard every single heart warming word.  
  
Lily looked back up at Dartz his soft smile never wavered so reassuring and gentle like the wind blowing in a spring evening.  
  
Bakura- ' that bastard hitting on my Lily goddammit I'm supposed to teach her the art of killing'  
  
However their moment was inturupted by the waitress which was 15 mins late by the way  
  
Waitress- what can I get y'all  
  
Bakura- I'd like some streak medium cooked please DID YOU EVER HEAR BAKURA SAY PLEASE? Neither have I .......  
  
Lily- I'll take some Greek salad please  
  
Dartz- same for me please  
  
Waitress- kay I'll come back with your meal in like 45 minutes  
  
Bakura- sure...... that's what they all say  
  
Waitress- what did you say  
  
Bakura- oh nothing  
  
Waitress- hmph (walks away)  
  
Lily- ' I luv that smile of his ....... Wait what did I say ...... ok bad thoughts bad thoughts'  
  
Bakura- why don't we take some pictures of the sweet couple (holds up a camera)  
  
Dartz- ah lets (Takes the digital camera from Bakura)  
  
So here begins the silent rampage of Dartz and the Camera. HE took those pictures from the oddest angles imaginable he even managed pulling out a over view of them using his (Bakura term) "atlantiany" powers on the camera  
  
It was quite amusing seeing people screaming their heads off because of a floating camera Malik and Ashley dint notice they were busy listening to a linkin park cd the song was nobody's listening ....... How did we know that? Well Dartz managed to zoom in with his evil camera of doom  
  
After 145 blackmailing galore pictures were taken, Dartz had to give everyone memory charm because they all thought he was a witch , they dint know that dartz was a guy ........ must be the hair  
  
whew that's the chapter people...... read & review 


	5. chappy 5

Bakura's revenge  
  
After dartz's crazy phsyco camera thing was over the waitress finally returned BEFORE 45 minutes was over so Bakura decided to have some fun!  
  
Bakura- its not even 45 minutes why are you here  
  
Waitress- well somehow its done before that so here ya go  
  
She set down the plates before Bakura Lily and dartz .  
  
Bakura- but you said 45 minutes  
  
Waitress -going red SUCK IT UP BUTTERCUP  
  
Bakura- grr - im not a butter cup  
  
Lily- since the waitress hates us..... im going to check my food for contamination  
  
Bakura- good idea  
  
Dartz- starts eating  
  
Lily- what if someone peed in that Dartz  
  
Dartz- who cares  
  
Lily- yuck.....  
  
So lily and Bakura checked their food not to their surprise they found 3 toenails, 6 strands of Blond hair .  
  
Lily- maybe we should give our food to dartz  
  
Bakura- Lily Lily Lily..... you are growing on me  
  
Lily- what do ya say  
  
Bakura- as far as I know this is payback for how he hit on you 30 mins earlier  
  
Lily- ok  
  
Bakura- ' that will teach dartz not to mess with my lily and get away with it'  
  
Lily- Dartzy.....?  
  
Bakura- ' DARTZY DARTZY WHAT HAS THE WORLD COME TO'  
  
Lily- we already ate icecream before coming here so would you like our food?  
  
Dartz- gladly!   
  
Now while Lily and Bakura were watching Dartz eat, both of them were wondering how he was so thin , the way he eats.  
  
Lily- ' hahaha now Dartz has consumed 3 toenails and six strands of blond hair and other things that we might've missed sucker!'  
  
Bakura-' yes eat up you fool so in three hours you would have the worst diarrhea attack in your life'  
  
meanwhile when dartz was stuffing his face, Ashley and Malik had recived their mantu which was delicious by all means!  
  
Malik- that was good  
  
Ashley- ya  
  
Malik then noticed dartz stuffing his face  
  
Then Bakura's snowy white hair and Lily's silky black hair  
  
IT THEN HIT THEM  
  
They were being spied on !!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Ashley- lets go join them  
  
Malik lets give them the most frightful surprise ever  
  
Lily- Bakura they're getting up  
  
Bakura- they already know we are here there is no use hiding anymore  
  
So Malik and Ashley joined Bakura Lily and Dartz at their table until they thought it was Getting so crowded and they all got up and went to the booth where Malik and Ashley were sitting  
  
Lily and Ashley started chatting immediately they dint know however that Bakura was listening in!!!!!!!  
  
Lily- how was your first lesson  
  
Ashley- it was the best Malik's hot  
  
Lily- um ' should I tell her what Bakura told me? Nah leave her to suffer less work for me ! no what am I saying im turning into a female Bakura help me !' that's nice......  
  
Ashley- do you like your teacher  
  
Lily- my teacher  
  
Lily looked over to Bakura to see if he was watching he turned his head away  
  
Lily- fine but you cant tell anyone or else I'll kill you  
  
Ashley- what  
  
Lily- you heard me mortal (00)  
  
Ashley- Bakura has taught you to kill?  
  
Lily- uh yeah....... But that's not the point you tell you die got it?  
  
Bakura- ' that's good she likes me and not that Dartzy character ugh Dartzy evil!!!!! That girl is has really come a long way who knew she'd threaten her best friend? Hah amusing'   
  
Malik- isn't Ashley pretty?  
  
Bakura- what did you say?  
  
Malik- I said isn't-  
  
Bakura- I heard what you said  
  
Malik- but you just said you dint  
  
Bakura-that's not the point clearly I don't care anything for Ashley  
  
Malik – ah so you have your sights set upon Lily  
  
Bakura- that's not what I said (BLUSHBLUSH)  
  
Malik- yes that's what they all say  
  
Bakura- fine Lily is pretty happy fool?  
  
Malik- keep talking  
  
Bakura- the way her black hair sways in the wind is so alluring!  
  
Malik- ..... ok  
  
Dartz- she is pretty no?  
  
Malik- huh?  
  
Bakura- you stay away from my Lily or I will make sure I will sever your reproductive parts  
  
Dartz- 00  
  
Ashlyn- look they're fighting over you  
  
Lily- what? ( listens in to thoses hushed whispers when she hears those hushed whisperes)  
  
Dartz- she's mine  
  
Bakura- she'll be never yours  
  
At the moment dartz said that lily walked over to Dartz and  
  
Wham!  
  
A red hand mark now appeared on his cheek  
  
Lily was on the verge of tears "how could you Dartz"  
  
Dartz- I just said you were mine  
  
Lily- so that's what I am a piece of your property? You washed up atlantian king! Listen im going outside for a breath of air!  
  
And with that she stomped away  
  
Bakura- hah!  
  
Malik- 0-0 who knew Lily had it in her  
  
Ashley- Bakura, why don't you go and see if she is okay?  
  
Bakura- huh  
  
Ashley- you are the only guy she trusts right now  
  
Bakura- she trusts me ?  
  
Ashley- ya so go see if shes okay  
  
Bakura opened the door and saw Lily on the bench crying  
  
Lily-'how could I have been so stupid letting Dartz hug me like that I actually thought he was sincere! I feel like a whore!'  
  
Bakura timidly sat beside her "you going to keep crying like that?"  
  
Lily looked up "Bakura!?"  
  
"Listen girl, Dartz is like that he hits on every one don't take it too personally"  
  
"but I .... He had his hands around my waist and...."  
  
Lily sobbed harder .Bakura gingerly put his arm around her shoulder comforting her  
  
Lily's eyes snapped open Bakura? Comforting her ? 'could he feel the same as I feel for him?'  
  
' If I tell him then he might think I'm a slut or something!!!'  
  
"lily I don't think you're a slut"  
  
"what? Did you read my mind?"  
  
"yes you weren't talking so I took a sneak peek" stated Bakura  
  
more tears slid down her cheeks. Bakura could'nt take anymore of her pain  
  
With out warning he drew her into an embrace letting his hands run though her soft strands of silk.  
  
"don't cry , it pains me so much to see you in pain like this....."  
  
her cries became silent until they were no more. But Bakura still held her looking down at her he realized something he loved her ' I wont let any pathetic excuse for a living being to go anywhere near my lily! If they do I will sever their heads and enjoy every second of it'  
  
' but I have to show I care for her or atleast tell her I'm tired of stupid mortals hitting on her trying to claim her if anyone claims her it should be me I must let her know'  
  
slowly he moved a strand of hair away from her face tucking it behind her ears carfully as if she was a china doll and she could break any minute.  
  
Lily gasped  
  
Bakura put his finger up to her lips "hush Lily" sighing he continued "I know you probably would'nt want any males anywhere near you but hear what I have to say before you make that decision. When I met you I thought you are one of the most prettiest girl I've ever seen.  
  
I got to know you and I found out that your real beauty lies inside your heart and now I know you are the most prettiest girl I've ever seen. Not for your outer beauty but your inner beauty. Lily, I love you and if you turn me away I will still love you no matter what" finished Bakura  
  
"Bakura....... I love you too"  
  
Bakura smiled and for the first time he felt truly happy to be near a female.  
  
He softly stroked her hair. "maybe we should go inside... the others might wonder what we were up to" giggled lily  
  
Bakura raised an eyebrow "alright then lets go"  
  
MEANWHILE  
  
Ashley was struggling to get a better view outside the window but due to Dartz's spiky hair she could'nt see a thing  
  
Ashley- hey hey I cant see  
  
Malik- oh no they're coming sit down  
  
Ashley-pouting but I dint see a thing.....  
  
Dartz- don't worry I got it all right here (pointing to the camera) here it's bakura's so you keep it k?  
  
Ashley- sure  
  
Sitting back down malik started a conversation  
  
Malik- so I heard u hit on lily....  
  
Dartz- actually to tell you I'm a hope less romantic.....  
  
Ashley- uhuh.....  
  
Dartz- they looked so cute together so I sorta flirted with her to make Bakura realize he has feelings for her  
  
Ashley- aww that's sweet  
  
Malik- and what do you gain out of this?  
  
Dartz- the pure satisfaction to know I'll be the next cupid FEAR MY CURSE OF LOVE  
  
Ashley- --  
  
Bakura and lily walked in holding hands  
  
Dartz- and my little plan worked haahhaha I am cupid!!!!!! Bow down to me  
  
Ashley- ummm how about no....  
  
Dartz- I'm just fine with that  
  
Lily sat beside Ashley and Bakura sat next to her and Ashley whispered something into her ear with Bakura listening too.  
  
Lily- aww that's sweet thanks dartzy  
  
Bakura- so you really are hopeless are'nt you? I thought it was just a rumor but hey if it floats your boat..  
  
Dartz suddenly holds his stomach and runs to the mens room  
  
Bakura- (laughing hysterically)  
  
Lily- I kinda feel sorry for him  
  
5 mins later Dartz came out of the mens room  
  
Dartz- that bathroom is never going to smell the same  
  
All- 00  
  
Malik- its getting late  
  
Bakura- I agree lets leave  
  
Lily- hey dartzy you coming ?  
  
Dartz- nope im going back to my little caste in atlantis thank you  
  
Lily- ok ( gives dartz a hug) thanks for every thing  
  
Dartz- hey im coming back you know  
  
Lily- k till then  
  
Bakura- you like him over me?  
  
Lily- no why would you say that  
  
Bakura- cause ( counts fingers) you gave him a nick name, you hugged him 3 times I know how to count too you know, and you look at him strangely  
  
Lily- I don't like him Bakura  
  
Bakura- prove it (smirk smirk)  
  
Lily- fine  
  
She grabs Bakura and kisses him for a incredibly long time  
  
Ashley- (staring at her watch) you think they'll stop now?  
  
Malik- yup just watch  
  
Bakura and Lily both pull away  
  
Bakura- I'll never doubt you again  
  
Lily- that was my first kiss you know  
  
Bakura- yes I gave lily her first kiss ( punches the air)  
  
Ashley- --U  
  
Malik- lets go to my mansion for a sleep over  
  
Lily- that's a great idea wanna go ?  
  
Bakura- I wont miss this  
  
Ashley- ' malik's house I HAVE A REALLY BAD FEELING ABOUT THIS' sure I'll go!!!!!!  
  
Malik-good   
  
Whew long insane chapter!!!!  
  
Read & review 


	6. chappy 6

Bahahahahahah another chapter finished read it & tell me what ya think  
  
So they were walking to malik's mansion when Lily and bakura saw a knife store  
  
Lilyandbakura- OH MY RA !!!!! KNIVES  
  
And they ran into the store with Ashley and malik waiting outside  
  
Ashley- you think lily has changed?  
  
Malik- ( looks and sees lily tossing the knife expertly) no she hasn't ..... I hope  
  
Ashley-hmm  
  
Just then a bunch of girls holding I luv malik signs showed up  
  
Girls- we wuv you Malik  
  
Ashley- (squinting) is that you erin????  
  
Erin steps out of the shadows. "Ashley???? What you doing with malik HE'S MINE  
  
Ashley- so you're in the little fanclub too......  
  
Erin- ya I was the one who started it DUH!!!!!!  
  
Ashley- ' no if malik goes for erin...... I think im going to die' (sniffles)  
  
Malik eyes darted to Ashley ' are these girls giving stress to her???? Hah I'll get rid of them.  
  
Malik then slipped a hand around Ashley's waist as he drew her closer to him malik's head rested on ashley's shoulder.  
  
Malik smirked "don't you girls think it so obvious why im hanging around your friend here.... Heheheheh"  
  
ashley was so uncomfortable in this position malik was so close to her. Just then malik bit at her ear gently.  
  
Ashley- ' WHAT IS HE DOING??!?!?!?!?!?'  
  
Erin was shocked "oh my god ashley you are going out with malik????"  
  
Ashley- ' he probably wants to get rid of them .... I hope oh well I'll go along with it'  
  
Ashley turned around to face malik ' hope this works' She wrapped her arms around his neck and seductively ran her fingers through his long platinum blond hair.  
  
"yesssssssss he is my looooooooooooovvvvvvvvveeeeee my precccccccccccccciouuuuuuusssssssssss........."  
  
"agrh I thought you were my friend ASHLEY I'M LEAVING" and with that erin stomped away with her groupie.  
  
Mean while Malik was pulling Ashley closer and closer Ashley felt her heart stop for a second  
  
"did you really mean about the love part"  
  
' heck I cant lie to him I hate lying might as well tell him the truth' thought Ashley  
  
"yeah I love you more than any thing"  
  
"good cause I love you too....."  
  
Meanwhile  
  
Bakura- if you don't give us a 50 percent discount I will cut yo titties out  
  
Store manager- uh ok  
  
Bakura- good hahahahhahahaha  
  
Store manager- 0-0 gulp......  
  
Bakura- now if you give em for free I wont send u to the shadow realm  
  
Store manager- ok........  
  
Lily- --  
  
So they got the knives for free !!!!!!!!!! and as they headed out from the store they saw malik and Ashley's faces inched closer and closer  
  
Until the there were no more space between them  
  
Lily- ..... ;-; my eyes....  
  
Bakura- what a BLEEP  
  
Malik and Ashley stop kissing to find that a very dangerous looking Bakura and a very scared looking Lily were watching them  
  
Ashley- I uh...... love him?????  
  
Lily and Bakura took a few seconds to soak that in their minds  
  
Lily- I'm ok with that  
  
Bakura- YOU LITTLE BLEEP IF YOU HURT HER I WILL BLEEPING HURT YOU AND I WILL BLEEPING HANG YOU BY YOUR BLEEPING PENIS!!!!!!! NAKED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Malik- ......... (gulp....)......  
  
Lily- bakura..... you swore again  
  
Bakura turns to lily "sorry ... I'll warn you next time"  
  
Malik-'I'm scared for my life ;;'  
  
Soon they were at malik's mansion and the first thing every one thought was  
  
' this so looks like the Egypt section in the museum'  
  
Ashley's eyes darted to the clock it read 10:50......  
  
Ashley- Inuyasha's going to be on soon  
  
Malik- what is Inuyasha????  
  
Ashley- it's a really good show that only comes on once a week!!!!  
  
Malik- come on lets do something else  
  
Ashley- it's a romance  
  
Malik- never mind I'm in ( just for you people that don't know ..... EGYPTIANS ARE BIG SUCKERS FOR ROMANCE FILMS AND ROMANCE STORIES deal with it)  
  
Bakura- I'll watch it ... if I don't like it I'll send the television to the shadow realm  
  
Malik- fine but then you owe me another tv  
  
Bakura- sure... ok  
  
So Malik and lily made tea......... Ashley dint know how to but since lily Luvs tea, she knew the incredible knowledge of making tea in 15 different ways Plus adding the right spices to the tea!!!! Bakura was levitating all the pillows in their rightful position..... And if it wasn't perfect  
  
He'd send the pillow to the shadow realm, but bring the pillow back anyways because the living room just didn't look right.  
  
Ashley- if its called the living room why are you killing the poor pillows  
  
Bakura- because I am a feared person and killing pillows is my hobby!  
  
Ashley- ya know? I really feel sorry for lily  
  
Bakura- hey watch your tounge mortal without me here you'd me seduced by our little friend MALIK I'm only here because I need to protect Lily since she insisted not leaving you alone with MALIK !!!!!!! stupid mortal  
  
Ashley- why did you leave her alone with Malik?  
  
Bakura- Mortal? Do you know how many people my Lily has destroyed so far?  
  
Ashley- oh I get it so you think that lily could take care of herself?  
  
Bakura- (scary glare)  
  
Ashley- okay I am watching my tounge ( sticks out tounge and watches it)  
  
Bakura- I'd be worried about her too if I was Lily.... I mean this girl is clueless (watches Ashley watching her tongue's every move)  
  



	7. chappy 7

Chap 7  
  
Lily- humms a amr diab song ( if you guys don't know amr diab is a Egyptian singer and he has good music if ya know where to look)  
  
Malik- humms hakim song ( uh same thing)  
  
Lily- pouring boiling water in tea potHabibi wala ala balo shoqi elei......  
  
Malik- you know Arabic too?  
  
Lily-yuppers  
  
Malik- let us sing then ( posing)  
  
Lily- um ok  
  
Lily and malik- Habibi wala ala balo shoqi elei.  
  
My darling has no clue about my love for her.  
  
Wana shagheil bali anadi alei.  
  
She's on my mind and so I call for her.  
  
We layali keteer afakar fee, we ahein elei, wala daari.  
  
And many nights I think of her, and long for her, but she has no clue.  
  
Kefaya enni baalo leila we yom,  
  
It's enough that it's been a day and a night,  
  
Alatool fe khayali we mafish nom.  
  
That she has been on my mind, and I can't sleep at night.  
  
We layali keteer afakar fee, we ahein elei, wala daari.  
  
And many nights I think of her, and long for her, but she has no clue.  
  
Eiono feeh kalam fe leil ghallab,  
  
Her eyes tell me words that I cant resist.  
  
Mala albi gharam fe ahla azab.  
  
They filled my heart with love and the sweetest of tortures.  
  
We layali keteer afakar fee, we ahein elei, wala daari.  
  
And many nights I think of her, and long for her, but she has no clue.  
  
Lily- that was the sappiest song I have ever sung in my whole life  
  
Malik- its beautiful  
  
Lily- huh  
  
Malik- that song ...... it has such meaning  
  
Lily- touching malik's forehead are you okay???  
  
Malik- hmmmm im fine I feel so warm inside from the moment you touched my forehead  
  
Lily- I think you have a fever  
  
Malik- ah the fever of love....  
  
Lily-um ok fever of love I think you need to lie down  
  
Malik- Habibi wala ala balo shoqi elei.  
  
Wana shagheil bali anadi alei.  
  
We layali keteer afakar fee, we ahein elei, wala daari.  
  
Lily- picks up malik and puts him down on the couch now you stay put and no lovey dovey stuff ok?  
  
Malik- ok habibi  
  
Bakura- whats going on  
  
Lily- well malik went a little nuts in the kitchen and I brought him here  
  
Bakura- how nuts?  
  
Lily- he called me habibi  
  
Bakura- THAT LITTLE BLEEEEEEEEP  
  
Lily- I think hes sick  
  
BAkura- oh  
  
Lily- take care of him I gotta go check on the tea  
  
Bakura- ok  
  
Bakura walked over to malik long after lily was gone  
  
Bakura- what do you have to say for yourself????  
  
Malik- that girl is loyal the most I do that to fall head over heals  
  
Bakura- you were testing her loyalty????????  
  
Malik- sure if that what you want to call it  
  
Bakura- ( fumes)  
  
Malik- not in that way I mean I love Ashley  
  
Bakura- you better  
  
Malik- trust me I do  
  
Bakura- good  
  
so after lily came back  
  
Lily- here is some tea malik ( handing malik tea) and I brought you a cold cloth for your head ( lily pushed him down) lie down ! your in no condition to sit up young man  
  
Malik- 0-0 ' what a sudden outburst'  
  
Lilys kind warm smile came back  
  
Lily-now sip your tea  
  
Bakura- --  
  
Lily- ah here is your tea sweet heart ( handing bakura some tea)  
  
Lily- and uh ashlyn???  
  
Ashlyn was still watching her tounge  
  
Ashlyn- bakurwa towld mwe two watchth my thouge  
  
Lily- bakura........  
  
Bakura- ah yes you can stop watching your tounge  
  
Ashlyn- FINALLY  
  
Lily- inuyashas on (she flipped on the tv and the theme song played)  
  
Aiiro ni chirabaru nanatsu no hoshi yo Sorezore ni ima omoi wa tsunori uchikudakarete ai wo sakenda Nigedasu koto mo dekizu ni yume ni sugaritsuku Ikasama na hibi nado ni wa mou makenai  
  
Lily rested her head on bakura's shoulder snuggling for warmth. Ashley was going to sit on a chair beside malik but malik grabbed her wrist and pulled her under the covers Ashley was a red tomato  
  
Mezameyou kono shunkan wo Yagate bokura wo torimaku dearou Musekaeru you na riaru na nichijou Taisetsu na mono wa ... nanda'?! Zeitaku na sekai no naka ni miekakure suru eien no kakera Sawatte tsukande bokura no ima wo kicchiri aruitekou  
  
Ashley gingerly wrapped her arms around malik's torso and closed her eyes taking in his scent.  
  
"Koukai wa shinai" to, saki e susunda Warau ka, naku ka? Kou ka, fukou ka? Kekkyoku ima mo wakaranai kedo Kawarihajimeta mirai ni hirumu koto wa nai Sore ga jinsei no daigomi to iu mono deshou  
  
Girigiri wo ikiru bokura no dashita kotae ga Chigatta toshite mo omoikomi demo' Tsuyoku negaeba ii Honmono ni nareru hi made Reikoku na sekai no naka de tsubusaresou na aijou no mebuki Sawatte tsukande bokura no ima ni shikkari kizamikomou  
  
Mezameyou kono shunkan wo Yagate bokura wo torimaku dearou Musekaeru you na riaru na nichijou Taisetsu na mono wa ... nanda'?! Zeitaku na sekai no naka ni miekakure suru eien no kakera Sawatte tsukande bokura no ima wo kicchiri aruitekou Saigo ni, warau tame bokura no ima wo kicchiri aruitekou  
  
When he saw inuyasha malik couldn't help to laugh  
  
Malik- that hah looks ahhahaha just hahahahahah like ahahahhaha you!  
  
Bakura- YOU WOULDN'T THINK THAT DOG IS ME  
  
Inuyasha on tv- WHAT THE BLEEEEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEEEEEP  
  
Bakura- oh god I think im gona cry......  
  
Lily carefully sat on his lap and kissed every inch of his face ( literally) until Bakura started laughing  
  
Bakura- Lily hahahhaha stop this hahahhahahah it tickles hahaha  
  
Lily finally stopped leaving bakura to tears from laughing Soon a black haired man appeared on the screen and placed his hand on this girl's buttock  
  
Bakura- hahah that is sooooooooooooooooooooo you  
  
Malik- I'd have to admit that is my personality  
  
Ashley- --  
  
AFTER INUYASHA  
  
Ashley pops out this cd and plays it . It sounded just like the song Malik and Lily were singing except it was in French  
  
Malik and Lily- THAT IS SO RIPPED OFF OF AMR DIAB AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
  
Bakura and Ashley- -- this is going to be a long night  
  
END OF CHAPPY ok read and review this means you  
  
Lily- review or I will eat your soul  
  
Bakura- not before I gut them  
  
Malik- girls if you love me review  
  
Ashley- don't mind these weird people just review 


	8. chappy 8

Chap 8  
  
The group was well bored realllly bored. Suddenly bakura had a devious idea  
  
Bakura- why don't we play a little game  
  
Lily- what kind of game??  
  
Bakura- a dangourus game  
  
Lily- uh name???  
  
Bakura- I've never  
  
Lily- ok lets play  
  
Bakura- lets make a wager how about who ever who loses gets to be punished by the rest of the group?  
  
Everyone- agrees  
  
Malik- ok ill fill these cups with really sour lemon juice and there will be only enough for three sips.  
  
Bakura- the rules are..... someone says something that they never did and if the people around them did they get a sip from the evil lemon juice of doom. If your cup is done you lose understand??????  
  
Ashley- ya  
  
Lily- uhuh  
  
Bakura- ok I will start things off I've never spiked any punch  
  
Malik- -- takes a sip  
  
Bakura- smirks your turn malik  
  
Malik- I've never KILLED ANYONE  
  
Bakura and Lily- takes a sip  
  
Lily-2 Bakura-2 Malik-3 Ashlyn-3  
  
Ashley- o my god Lily???? You killed some one???  
  
Lily- nodded weakly  
  
Ashley- who did you kill?  
  
Lily- do you remember the icecream shop owner?????  
  
Ashley- you killed him?????? ;; he was so nice to me though  
  
Lily- nice???????????  
  
FLASHBACK  
  
Icecream shop owner- we only accept bills no coins  
  
5 yr old Ashley- but mommy only gave me coins  
  
Icecream shop owner- mocking tone'but mommy only gave me coins' GET THE HELL OUT OF MY STORE!!!!!!!!!  
  
END OF FLASH BACK  
  
Ashley- oh ya well he was nice to you  
  
Lily- uh define nice  
  
FLASHBACK  
  
5 yr old Lily- walking around ' which one which one I gotta get a yummy flavor  
  
icecream shop owner- ' teenagers these days always stealing things' sees Lily 'that one looks suspicious I'll have to keep an eye on her'  
  
Lily- looks at a flavor 'bloody murder who'd eat that???? Maybe I'll just get some candy' reaches for a snickers bar  
  
Icecream shop owner- AHA caught in the act  
  
Lily- but I was going to pay for it .... ;;  
  
Icream shop owner- ya right 5 yr olds can't afford icecream!  
  
Lily- pulls a hundred out of her pocket I have money though  
  
Icecream shop owner- that's probably a PHONEY GET THE HELL OUT OF MY STORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
END OF FLASH BACK  
  
Bakura- Stupid mortal icecream shop owner  
  
Lily- that stupid imbecile,I should've tortured him before I killed him  
  
Everyone- 00  
  
Lily- sips tea and nice kind smile comes back why are you all staring at me  
  
Bakura- puts an arm around her that's why I love her  
  
Ashley- anywaysssssssss whos turn is it  
  
Lily- yours  
  
Ashley- oh ya I've never had to run away from my own fanclub  
  
Malik- love why do you torture me so? takes sip  
  
Malik- 2 Bakura-2 Lily-2 Ashlyn-3  
  
Bakura- HAhahahahha for once I'm happy not having a fan club!  
  
Lily- my turn ..... I know this is going to hurt me....but o well ... I've never kissed anyone on the lips !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
All take a sip  
  
Bakura- smirks  
  
Malik- 1 Bakura-1 Lily-1 Ashlyn-2  
  
Bakura- watch out mortals its my turn I've never possessed a pointy millennium rod  
  
Malik- takes final sip I guess I lose  
  
DUNDUNDUN what will malik's punishment be?????? Review and give me ideas 


	9. chappy 9

Bakura- hahah malik you dimwit  
  
Malik- grrrr  
  
Lily- now now don't fight  
  
Bakura and malik go at it  
  
Lily- they never listen to me!  
  
Ashley- BEAN MY NAME IS BEAN  
  
ANY WAY ON TO THE CHAPPY  
  
Bakura- hmmm let us think ..... What shall we make Malik do or more importantly what do we want to do to malik  
  
Lily- yes what love?  
  
Ashley- how about nothing  
  
Bakura and lily- how about no?  
  
Bakura- hmmm how about we give him a make over, get him a pink fluffy dress and make him walk around town in it?  
  
Lily- that would seem quite weird as people outside will think that he is a cross dresser  
  
Bakura- then I will make it Halloween with my millennium ring ! no one will notice a thing  
  
Lily- hah why dint I think of that  
  
Bakura- uses his millennium ring to make it Halloween and makes a pink fluffy dress and some make up appear alright we are all set lets begin on our art of torturing  
  
a few hours and some muffled screams later out the door came malik the pink fluffy crossdresser with a goodie bag in his I mean her hand. Lily dressed as a princess 00, Ashley dressed up as Mr bean ( her idol in humor), Bakura dressed as a vampire well all he really needed was a cape and black clothes because he was so pale already, and malik....... Well you know  
  
Malik- ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh this is horrible  
  
Ashley- aww don't be sad you kind of look pretty....  
  
Malik- sniff that made me feel a lot better  
  
Bakura- chasing Lily hahah come back here princess I will bite you and you will be thunderclap my VAMPIRE QUEEN hahahaha  
  
Lily- oh nooooooooooooo  
  
Ashley- -- seems that they are enjoying this ....  
  
Malik- ya..... dammit why the dress whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy meeeeeeeeeeeee?  
  
When they finally reached the houses .....  
  
Bakura- hahah now ...... begins the first of our torture  
  
Lily- now come on to the first house  
  
ding dong  
  
girl comes out- ugh you made me miss the first part of yugioh  
  
Bakura- WHAT YUGIOH ??????? THAT IS A BLEEP BLEEEP BLEEEEEEEEP show you should watch this hands her a video cassette  
  
Malik- oh ra no  
  
Girl- reads the label ku-ra-oh this sounds cool thanks  
  
Bakura- My pleasure now don't watch yugioh anymore it messes with your head ...... and pharaohs aren't the best tombrobbers are okay?  
  
Malik- sure they are  
  
Girl- ok thank you looks at malik is he a cross dresser?  
  
Lily- uh maybe......  
  
Girl- that's gross anyway heres your candy goodbye!  
  
Bakura- I am wayyyyyyyyyyyyyy better than that washed up pharaoh  
  
Lily- yeah yeah lets go to those other houses  
  
So after they were done malik had been beaten to a pulp because every one thought he was a cross dresser despite it was Halloween ( or Bakura made it to be) and they headed this time to Bakura's house for the rest of the sleepover!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
read and review plz 


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